Sometimes I get a little confused with the physical aspects of dating. I'm never really sure when things are appropriate, like when is the right time to have a first kiss, when to have the first make out session, how far should it go, etc... I'm a complete ditz when it comes to this stuff because I tend to play by completely different rules than everyone else. My rules are, if I feel like doing it, I should do it. If not, then there's no way in hell it's going to happen.
So there was this guy that I really liked, and after waiting hopelessly for him to ask me out for a while, I decided, what the hell, I'll ask him out myself and I did. So on our date, we went to this place that offered a skyline view of the city, which is usually quite beautiful. Unfortunately for us, there was a light sand storm in the making, so everything was a little bit of a haze, but that didn't stop us from standing at the railing and watching all the cars go by underneath. The date had it all, it had the view and more importantly, it had the conversation. This was one of those dates where the two of you really connect, really get to know each other and tell each other about your insecurities. I felt the butterflies flutter excitedly in the pit of my stomach and looking into his eyes, I think he felt them too.
Then, I screwed it up....
It was one of those moments, where I had revealed a vulnerable part of me and looked away, reliving some distant memory, that my date put his arm around me in comfort. I was feeling vulnerable and not entirely sure about the appropriateness of it. I know that that type of physical contact should not be a big deal and call me a prude, another Sandra Dee, but I was entirely not ready for it at that moment. I really liked this guy and I didn't want to offend him, and so I did nothing. He got the message loud and clear, and pulled his arm away.
It turns out that my reaction, or lack thereof, had led him to a confused state. Subsequent dates after that, were enjoyable, yet slightly awkward and coupled with the fact that we only kissed much, much later, the whole incident left him guessing.
In retrospect, keeping him on his toes maybe isn't such a bad thing after all.... It may have been the secret to the great relationship that developed from that date onwards....
3 comments:
The first few dates in a relationship are always so nerve racking!! Well actually, even if a relationship doesn't develop. You aren't comfortable enough with each other to actually ask how fast is too fast, so its a huge guessing game. But those first date butterflies are amazing.
Yes I thought that's what everyone does is do what they what ...you know the kind of fly by the seat of your pants thing..lol sounds like you kept his attention so good job. Always leave them guessing, they love the chase!
I love the butterflies... gotta have the butterflies :)
Post a Comment